the bitch is dead man
YOUR DOG DIED?
no i meant my mom has passed out .. so i'll be over soon.
ohhh my god. this party should be titled "my hookups of summers past" be expecting some good stories tomorrow
i just woke up at 8pm naked in my bed, with a fresh haircut. I wonder what barber i went to.
I don't remember much but I remember it was a unanimous decision that Santa was indeed real and Cait's stripping somehow proved this.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
From scraping the remnants from a coke bag at a lingerie party to meeting with an 80 year old man to discuss civil rights all in under 12 hours bizarrely feels like the epitome of my life
Either I'm tripping balls or my dog has super powers.
I WANT TO. I JUST IMAGINE HIS BEAUTIFUL BLONDE HEAD INBETWEEN MY LEGS AND I BREAK DOWN AND START CRYING.
telling her she was ovary-acting wasn't the greatest idea. doing it in a text so she could see your spelling was where you really went wrong, though.
I think I may have some undocumented and undiscovered std that causes girls to go bat shit crazy. How you got it is beyond me
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's fun yes. But hard on the body. I woke up with her purse, socks and one of her shoes in my room. The other shoe was outside. What the fuck were we doing last night?
I may not be his cup of tea, but I bet I'm his 10th shot of tequila
I just drove my booty call to his booty call, if that isn't spreading the love, I don't know what is.
The medical term is prolapsed anal walls if you want to look into it with dignity.
I always can't wait to see you but when there's also an opportunity to get naked it elevates to an entirely different level
I just got the high sucked out of me. Fuck.
Randomize
