I missed Saved by the Bell this morning, but Ashley in a later episode of Fresh Prince is keeping the morning wood alive.
Everytime she would start slurring, she'd stop, hold up a finger, wait like 30 seconds, then try again. I love drunk people
since i spend so many of my nights sleeping on the bathroom floor i think im going to remove all toiletries from under my sink and replace them with a pillow and blanket.
His bootycalls folder in his contacts are divided into regions, we should have all become airline pilots.
There is a mirror in the headboard of the bed that I'm sleeping in so I can immediately question life choices when I wake up.
I'm sorry for not being sorry about whatever shit I did to you when you were annoying and I was drunk. That is all.
I just used a VHS tape as a plate for sanwich
I got really upset about missing him last night when I was demonstrating penis sizes of the people I've slept with using a tape measurer to my roommates
I'm content with our "friends with accidental benefits" situation.
We just stood outside and debated the existence of mermaids for about 20 min. Is this what too drunk is?
She said I'm going to get you stoned and have you fuck me on the couch.
"WHAT IS THIS LESBIAN MADNESS"
He grabbed at it like it was a stress ball or something. It's a boob, not a grapefruit. The fuck.
Andddddd I'm drunk
Andddddd it's Tuesday
That's your opinion.
Thank god you don't know my other address I'm safe for now
Awww you know you would like it if I found u
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