Katie Perry lied, you can't just wake up and shake the glitter off your clothes.
just spent the last 4 hours searching ex-girlfriend porn to make sure there are no photos of me
Stop selling my mother weed! She's annoying as hell when she's stoned.
I have a spoon shaped bruise on my ass...
You want to move to a city because of their promotional beer pricing
So?
This is why you shouldn't make decisions
Two girls just making out in the elevator. Didn't stop when the doors opened. Part of me didnt mind, but part did. Bc I wanted to get on the elevator without it getting awkward. Am I gay?
i just remember explaining why my socks were better than everyone elses.
I'm currently looking through google images of circumsized penises and realizing how vital pre-marital sex is.
Did I really make him pull over to give the homeless guy my bra?
We were in the middle of fucking and she was just like "Do ya wanna play Harry Potter Scene It?" I musta been really bad lol Anyways, her tattoo healed nicely.
This feeling I'm having... is it love or a combination of alcoholism and unprotected rough sex
stoners and superglue do NOT mix
I'm almost too old to be on The Real World but feel like I'm too young to be on The Bachelor and I'm just really confused with my place in life.
I know you're having some issues right now but can we focus on the gangbang?
I've never been so excited to be bleeding from my vagina.
Randomize
