I plan on using my big titties for evil tonight.
Come home. Power Hour by yourself is only fun for the first 10 minutes.
Is there a nice way of saying 'touch my penis or i dont really wanna hangout"?
We had sex on my friends waterbed ..after that the whole school kept asking him if he had fun getting "sea-sick" last night.
you started crying about dinosaurs being extinct
that's why i woke up holding that dina girls hand
she's a dina-saur
Can I sleep on your couch? My wife just found my eHarmony account.
Sunday is the day of rest.
As in, whatever liquor is left after last night, you have to drink the rest.
How many of my tattoos need to be visible for an outfit to be considered "see-through"?
no dont worry i changed into my costume in the hospital bathroom
I've injured myself in such a way that i am only capable of making love standing up now
I should be a dude... Walking a goat on a rope is a total chick magnet.
Am I not being subtle enough by giving him a rainbow striped bong, during PRIDE MONTH?
Btw, you owe me. One (1) orgasm.
11:30 and people are pissing in the sink. It's gonna be a good night.
I want you inside me. Finish your papers.
Randomize