thanks...oh and i got my period
Jon and Kate are totally playing with my emotions.
i mean i care more about their marriage then my own parents
she had the hairiest bush ive ever seen. it looked like a spoiled head of lettuce.
my affection for youporn is starting to get disturbing... i just thought about sending them a christmas card
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I am waking up at 7am to go to church with him and his family... I better get eaten out tonight.
She asked me how I live with myself. I told her one night at a time.
At what point in my life was I not hugged enough to be on my fourth walk of shame in half as many weeks?
I'm in a hotel full of Marines. I'm leaving here pregnant.
Like if there was an award for best way to take a girls virginity, he would get a standing ovation. And first prize. Probably a bunch of roses too. That good.
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I feel like I have two modes: Super fuckin high, or super giddy from caffeine. I have learned to accept this.
Mass text to all of my back up boy toys. First one here wins. Mama needs some.
We decided to make playlists for each other. Do you know any songs that say "sorry I'm not as hot as your prostitute ex?"
I hope so much that you got average or above average dick tonight because I wish you the best
After round two, I told him he deserves an award. He bowed and did a princess wave WHILE his dick was still inside me.
So, Kevin dropping me off at urgent care. Seems my tampon slipped out of reach. Even after he tried to get it out with some kitchen tongs.