Thanks for last night it was amazing as always
What are you talking about
You've got to be kidding me
please pick me up with an explanation of why i shacked in a trailer with a guy who doesnt have a car.
I have to have sex with him again. I feel like I need to train him so no other girl experiences that bad of sex.
Bad news is I found gravy in my nightstand again.
It's raining. Will need ride home and blow job.
Tis the season to puke in grandma's bathroom
Is it weird to say that Kobe reminds me of a wise brontosaurus?
My drug dealer just asked me to go see Les Mis on Christmas. Should I be worried this is some type of musical set-up?
We are gonna sacrifice to and pray to every god in this world that he doesn't find out about her sleeping with his old roommate.
Whenever someone tells me they've never met a bisexual, I feel like a majestic fucking unicorn.
remember when I lost my virginity and said I could see myself becoming a sex addict?? Well I'm pretty sure that time has come
Started out playing table tennis then ended up fucking him on the table. Happy cinco de mayo
Can you send me a picture of your dog? I might need to borrow him so I can wear a speedo to a pool party on Friday
Hypothetically - think of it as Schrodinger's blow-job.
Sorry my friend with benefits tried to run you over with his car
Randomize
