Let me rephrase. Would it display my intentions too much if i walked all the way across my office and into the bathroom carrying my book
I think I breastfed the cat at some point during the night, at least that's what my nipples are saying
I know I am usually the slut but tonight it's her. She is being a slut, yes slut, T as in Tomorrow, U as in Uterus, L as in Llama and S as in Sangria. That spells slut, but backwards and that's what she is being.
The higher i get, the less gay he looks, and the more i want to make out with him. This is dangerous.
its like accelerated beer pong for children.....we train champions young
He bought me Ben & Jerrys and then apologized for the fact that he was going to fall asleep before we could have sex
I'm tangled in a fishing net down at the harbor. This has nothing to do with Captain Morgan. Bring wirecutters.
i actually pissed myself from laughing when I saw the old man in lingerie carrying a spiderman purse. I dont know if he was real or if it was the tequila, but my head hurts.
I remember three things: you falling down an entire flight of stairs, me stripping out of your Christmas one-sie to do cartwheels in my underwear, and people standing above me saying, "where did that bump on her head come from?"
Also, I was told I kept the antlers on the entire time. I'm deeming last night a success.
We passed my parents while I was giving him road head...that awkward
My dating life has become some fucked up hydra of dicks; you cut one off and two pop up in its place.
You kept chewing on the empty milk carton and saying "kitty" over and over again. It was an interesting night.
Just an FYI i'm going to get drunk as shit while you are on duty and attempt to not fall into the bathtub again.
Rodger that.
Gotta wait until my full time offer is confirmed before I try to fuck the mid level manager
As long as it's more "this is where i see an issue" vs "psst.... tiddies" then i have no argument
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