Oh man dude like 1000 to 1500 milligrams. Its gonna burn like bad though.
I'm sorry for everything. i woke up with two citations stapled to my shirt.
elementary school lunch room party. everyone brings their own lunch and can trade stuff. all juice is booze.
I told my boyfriend my favorite food was strawberry poptarts, now my email inbox is getting spammed with nude pics of him with his dick in a poptart box..
These 33 Eskimo Brothers Boinked The Same Person And Couldn’t Be More Proud
My boyfriend woke me up in the middle of the night to have sex with me right before I had sex with another guy in my dream. What a unique sixth sense his penis has.
he just used "boss" and "boner" in the same sentence. I cant respond.
It's only 10 in the morning...josh is already on the way to the ER for trying to shotgun a beer with a sparklers sticking out of it on fire.
You just squeezed a person out of you and I'm drunks at 2PM. Our lives got traded and you know it and you're jealous.
Nothing like the It's a Small World ride at Disneyland to remind you to take your birth control. I took it on the boat yesterday
17 Inappropriate Things People Did With Instruments
Hung over and there is no way in the world I can make this mess look good today. Only solution is to stay drunk.
while i am personally glad that we met...i feel like for society as a whole it was a bad thing
I know, but the fabulousness of my baggies should not be what defines my business as a drug dealer.
If I die tonight, I want you to have the rest of my nachos. And my porn collection.
Ran into a tinder match at the bar last night. We spotted each other and started making out without speaking any words to each other. Fuck yea technology!
I'm sobbing to NWA