take it from a girl who woke up with a girl in her bed... you were not that drunk.
I legitimately sent him a storybook of naked pictures.
Apparently I mistakenly called the hair club for men at 3am... they called me back this morning.
What happened to "I wouldnt even touch her with a ten foot pole"?
Her vagina devoured it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
For u too. Could be years before u have a finger in ur ass
When your boyfriends ex-girlfriend texts you to see what you're wearing to his sister's wedding that you were not invited to, nor knew about. I think it's time to call it quits.
I recommend we watch the Super Bowl together and have celebratory sex if we win. Good news is I don't have a team I dislike so were guaranteed a win.
New BDSM fun fact. When you get spanked hard enough with a flat object, you get welts. Welcome to thunderdome, bitches.
My homemade mace ate through its aluminum container. I make awesome mace.
I am just glad I was home to catch most of it, cause it smells BAD.
I'm not a scientist but that could be because it's homemade mace. That is however just a hypothesis
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
As a plus, I've lost 5 pounds in two days, so "party all weekend" is officially a valid diet plan.
the girl whose rug I peed on is here
i got to his house for our first date at the same time as his dealer, so what I'm saying is I'm in love
He was awesome with her today. I can't say that it didn't make my Fallopian tubes sing "The Hills Are Alive."
She looked like a cross between Jesus and John Lennon. So I fucked her. I feel majestic and powerful.
i only got to wear my halloween costume for an half hour before it got taken off.
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