your thong is hanging out like whoa
make any headway on the foot/dick situation?
Hey on the reals though tomorrow if i take you out to lunch as just a friend will you also suck my cock as just a friend?
Well you really should've thought of that before you painted your walls the same color as your toilet
Imagine the time you most wanted to kill yourself. Now add a room full of jail bait and no booze. Multiply that by a million.
second roommate of the year to get clamydia. go life.
thank you for extending my knowledge of the effects of vodka. speak of what happened last night and i will kill you and send your fingers to your loved ones.
Wait, just ask him if can you can join in. You haven't lived until you've taken part in a threesome with your father...or so I've heard
I just set a reminder on my phone to get star spangled hammered this weekend.
I'm not sure I can continue to condone our having sex in all of your friends' beds
It would have been nice to break the dry spell with nice, civilized, sober sex somewhere other than on my friend's couch.
I spent $31 at mcdonalds last night. Threw my nuggets all over the yard, ate them out of the snow, picked a fight about it, vomited, then passed out.
Naked.
I just want you to make me second guess my worth as a human. Is that too much to ask?
69'd by candlelight when the power went out.
Ran into my FWB on my walk of shame and went back to her place. Even my walk of shames are awesome!!!
Randomize
