His vagina is bleeding blood all over the court
you finished all 5 burgers, started crying tears of joy, and then claimed the tears were actually just 'meat sweats' from your eyes
She gave him HEAD floating down the river in a tube as big a a tire. I just don't know how to compete with that sort of level of slut.
He dumped me and I don't wanna fuck his best friend for revenge. Is this what maturity feels like?
Your scrotum should have touched every square inch of that place by now. Start with the water fountain.
The guy that just projectile vomited over the balcony is now going down to find the pill he just puked up. He said he wasn't about to waste $15.
I had to jump out of her car while it was moving enough said
A man just poked my foot with his crutches while I'm shitting. Is that how the disabled gays ask for a glory hole blow jay?
So who won the naked front yard Olympics last night?
Well my tits are spray painted gold & i have what i think r the Olympic rings shaved in my vag !!!!!!!SO its safe to say i won something ....
I just want my birth control to stop making me feel like I'm watching baby seals get clubbed to death any time anything even remotely unpleasant happens lol
My flask has coffee in it for finals week.. So that's responsible right?
yeah, never be friends with someone with shitty eyebrows.. they obviously already make poor life choices
There was a woman who drank mouth wash to get drunk during her supposed detox...this is def the internship for me!
I don't even know if he's actually hot or just hot because he plays hockey..
You did not just say that.
So a bottle of lube exploded all over my softball bag and Nike shirt.
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