I'm afraid my bank account can't handle syllabus week.
Before I left in the morning I deleted her purity ring app off her iPod, I figured it would save her the shame
Checked out the free sonogram van on campus and got a free DVD of my sweet food baby.
You refused to come over and kept yelling that you were gonna sleep on a car
We started telling people we were married, and then we hooked up on a park bench
You crawled everywhere and rolled in ice cream. No more vodka for a month.
My date just wheeled me home in a shopping cart but it was normal
Right now, there's some ten year old kid getting ready to go outside and play basketball. He will soon find out his basketball hoop was no match for my car.
Swish.
well it can jab him in the chin so I am 100% sure he can suck his own dick
almost just sent your mom a dick pic. almost.
I woke up naked in her room. More precisely, I woke up naked in her room with her and her sister laughing at my penis. I hate my life.
He suffocated between her tits, but she didn't notice because he still came.
Look, all I'm looking for is a good time and someone whose chest I can bury my face in
Beer. Pizza. Seething Rage. I will be full of two of these things tonight. You get to decide which two.
So you're not opposed to us ever having sex again? Because it just seems like such a waste to let a penis like yours go.
Randomize
