Just saw an Asian guy riding his razor scooter to class. Dreams do come true
Just puked on the beach. Hungover. In front of my parents. I love summer.
so would me posting the photos of the cock and coin jar incident be completely out of the question?
FYI...Jose likes Shamrock shakes better than Jack
Get in your clown car, pick up everyone you know, and head to the park. drunk Sledding grand prix tonight. winner takes home the leftover beer
she comes in perfect pitch. hook up with more singers.
Can you bring me a corn dog or something shaped like one?
I just got three pairs of underwear free and a bathing suit for $20 by modeling them and letting the salesman grope me a bit.
It's great being a young gay man in Chicago!
The typical response to someone smacking their vodka soaked hand on your face is not to put your face in their crotch
Yeah. I woke up in an awkward three way spoon with him and his sister. Tequila!
did you just correct my grammar and then send me a photo of your dick?
Give me 20 minutes.. I'm going to need to start off with an orgasm to get through this day
I wore a bathing suit downtown so I didn't have to put on underwear, I obviously don't have my shit together
You put a bag of sliced onions in the microwave then screamed, "voila, onion rings!"
I woke up to find I still had sequins under my tits. I'd say Sunday was a success.
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