Bc you can definitely buy condoms if ur a 14 year old girl
you say it like running around in your thong wasted is a bad thing
WHAT THE FUCK. SUCH A BAD IDEA. YOU'RE NO LONGER IN CHARGE OF NOSE SUBSTANCES.
You tried to initiate "Occupy McDonald's" when the cashier didn't give you enough ketchup.
She literally got down on all fours and I swear did a 360 degrees head rotation exorcist barf...and then moaned IT WAS THE TACO BEEEELLLLLL
so no, not her best night
He visits one Denver strip club and now hes moving there
Sweet tea and masterbation. It's how I manage.
The day i have a fb album titled " I have become a townie" you can shoot me in the foot and tell me to get my life together
And I threw up 26 times yesterday. I actually think I threw up a spider too.
You are attracted to power and since you can't date the married old guy you have to go for the next best thing - his gay son
I swear to god if you settle for a trump supporting packers fan, I will not acknowledge your children. You're better than that.
I remember yelling at him telling him that the strippers were "nice people."
woke up this morning to a baggy full of adderall and two redbulls..i'm gonna marry this guy one day
If you need me I'll be in the hospital involving super glue and fake eyelashes.
like, there were so many other better not terrible choices you could have made, so i'm honestly baffled that you managed to fuck up that bad
Randomize
