careful when you do the walk of shame, they are handing out bibles on campus
i got kicked out of Barns and Nobles cuz i put all the bibles in the fiction section
hey can i ask you a kinda weird question?
i know what the question is. yes they are bigger, and no i did not get plastic surgery
He's on drugs...like drugs for horses.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If a cop asks you "Where do you go for fun?", it's not a pick up line...especially if he just pulled you over.
Gross thing of the day...i got cum in my new boots
explain the broken jalepenos in my underwear drawer?
Multiple bruises and a hell of a headache later, I have still to find out where the fuck I picked up the bottom half of a mannequin.
are you just inviting me because you can't afford an actual stripper?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I woke up with my shoes still on and my pants around my ankles cause I couldn't get them over my shoes
at one point while they were drilling into my jaw I just remember thinking "will I ever be able to suck dick again"
So the remote for the camera in the photo booth must have gotten dropped on the floor. while you were in there. having a threesome. on the floor of the room where my parents stay when they visit me. so thanks.
Thanks for listening. You're the first guy I've ever worked with who I didn't want to fuck.
Soo are you just gonna poop in my bathtub and not talk to me anymore...?
Do you remember telling those ppl that they need to mate and give you the baby and in 15 years you will all reunite and it will be a party?
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