My place. Tomorrow Night. Bring your liver, and something for it to do.
Im at the zoo right now high out of my mind and feel as if the animals are watching me and Im the one in a cage.
First night in the new apartment. There are 12 people here i don't know, Tequila, and a crying girl locked in our bathroom. I think the apartment christening is complete.
whiskey dick. though we did manage to break my closet door and flood the bathroom.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm reciting my presentation (beer in hand) on the porch to a snowmen audience.
made the entire pub sing the british national anthem, puked, rallied, then peed in a telephone booth and have pictures to prove it, taking tourism to another level since 2012.
It is 9pm, let the ass parade to the bars begin
I promised him we could have sex if he would let me take him to the hospital to get stitches.
Now in just stoned listening to my dads philosophical idea about public transit
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yes I am wallowing. There is a significant lack of cookie dough
All she has to do is text me and my dick gets hard. It doesn't matter what it's about. Last text was about a homeless dude
He ripped down his Kate Upton poster while we were having sex last night. Im gonna take that as a good sign.
Not sure but if it exists I will find it and I will fill my face with it
As I took my shirt off he commented on how great my boobs where. I responded with "thanks, I grew them myself"
I came and sneezed at the same time. Words can't describe how awesome it was.
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