My ? Is...... Would it be sweet or creepy to take a girl on a first date to chigago?
creepy.
when "blow-job jen" drunk dials you at 3 in the morning, you answer
i cant text you anymore tonight, God gave me two hands for two cups
i knew you were okay when you wanted to eat in the ambulance
i was holding a cup in her face for her to throw up in while screaming THIS IS THE DEFINITION OF FRIENDSHIP
Its like "fucckkkkk yooouuuuuu" is echoing up my esophagus
tequila?
yep
Jk. Anyone who everbeers with me is my type.
My final act is to send you this message. I love you. Tell my family that I love them. Except my dad. Tell him I said "Eh..." while rocking your hand side to side. And tell Tim that I will always love the idea of him. Tell Caleb I love him so. Take care of Miss Kitty Fantastico. Tell the world that I will watch over. Good bye. I love you.
You shall now refer to my vagina as patty and patty only
I'm working on a search warrant...can u pick up box of Chardonnay...I'll give u cash when u get here...
Yea... I love that ur a prosecutor and drink box wine
Dude, you were tagged in a stripper FB selfie. That is a whole new level of something.....
Cocaine is ok on a cleanse, right?
i just watched a 7 minute video on people making a hot air balloon for their dog and i am a changed person
well ya only live once...
that cant be your answer for every horrible thing you do
on one hand I spent like $120 last night..on the other that was the best sex of my life
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