Nights of college: 1. Virgins: 1. Yes.
So apparently vaginal secretions are not covered under water damage insurance for my cell phone
he literally just asked me which v neck he should wear tomorrow.
Gotta love hanging with Nat. By the time guys realize she isnt going home with them, they've spent enough money and time to think I'm a good idea.
guess who's eating a vending machine cheese danish, has no panties on, and is still the classiest bitch at this bus stop?
I don't know what I should tell you tell you. I don't want to encourage you to dye my dog.
About to see some guy and give him a glance that tries to express how sorry i am for blowing his friend while he was getting a BJ in the same room
You could probably play six degrees of separation of my cock in this city.
I just sent you a google doc listing all the reasons why I should stop hooking up with him. Feel free to add to it.
When you wake up so hungover that you don't even wanna cough for fear of vomiting... It's not gunna be a good day.
I had a dream about that dude. It was the first time I had a dream about him since the tryst.
The tryst?
The hookup. I like using sophisticated words for my foolish decisions. Makes me retain some dignity.
Plus my fingers were hella swollen from eating all these cured meats so it was like I was given it to her with Hulk Hands on
Come on, will you just fuck him so we can watch Star Wars.
The gift for sixth anniversary is steel. He bought me handcuffs. Inee I married the right man!
For someone who's supposed to be gay Greg is really good at seducing me into things I don't wanna do
Randomize