She had a bottle of NAIR in her bathroom, but she clearly hadn't been using it.
I thought she was going to get passionate and throw her on the bed and fuck her, but she just started breaking stuff.
That's the thing about women.
I'm such a slut...i kept having sex with him after he called me his ex gf's name. I just felt like i deserved something out of it too.
benefit of terrorism--they won't let you buy random one way plane tickets to random parts of the country for no reason nonmatter how high you are.
The wedding was scheduled to start 5 min. ago. 20 people here so far, groomsmen in tees and jeans, catering by Costo. NO ONE OUR AGE IS READY FOR MARRIAGE!
He looks like he has a penis
What the fuck
A good one, a good penis
No I am not eating basil off your cock
Kid sitting next to me smells like he slept in a dutch oven full of farts. Going to die.
I don't remember anything that happened last night past 10.. I made him buy me a Buckeye's Donut tshirt. I have no idea why he'd want to fuck me after that.
A girl at the bar is wearing green body paint instead of a shirt. Where are you?!
I mean, yeah, she was cheating on me but I've been fucking her brother. My secret relationship trumps her secret relationship.
Living in the dorms has served one purpose and one purpose only for me: to teach me that pooping in public bathrooms is okay and that I can do it
Are you okay?
I went home with a 38 year old guy in a kilt, do I look okay!
Someone drank my pedialite!
YOU drank your pedialite. I watched you chase shots with it!
I can get weed and taco bell delivered but frozen peas and a loaf of bread are just too scarce, what the hell is wrong with people?
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