It's hipsters with their motorcycle cop mustaches, moccasins, douchey irony, and department stores to supply their independent conformity
Something's gotta give!
I just put on my hot pinky lace thong... you know what that means! ;)
Oh god. Slutty you is on the run. Someone needs to alert the city.
just watched an entire episode so you think you can dance for head. so wasn't worth it
a creepy fucking ass man came up and started raven cawwing in my ear... he said it was the raven mating call. i am officially freaked out
You weren't lying about those ceramics students giving the best hand jobs.
He puked at the bar then immediately procceded to slip in it, they loaded him up into a wheelchair, then the staff and myself walked him outside, all the while never having to pay for our tab. SO using this strategy again
It's like a puppy that we have to take care of at all times or else she'll get sad, lonely, and chew on the furniture. And by 'chew on the furniture', I mean have anonymous sex.
Her pussy was so beautiful. That's what I'LL miss the most. Not the omelets. You're the roommate, obviously our priorities on this situation are vastly different.
You didn't act like you were blacked out yesterday...
I didn't know
Just watched a guy ride a bike off his roof into his pool. On my way to the liquor store, picking you up in 20
we broke the bed, curtan rods, a dresser drawer, and unless I didn't notice it before, we put a hole in the wall. This is why he and I have to fuck in motels.
he wouldnt let me in bed until i took off all the stickers i was covered in
Hey, it's all about finding the bright side. And boobs are definitely a bright side.
My mom is coming to visit today & it's giving me anxiety. I feel like she can see through me & into the whore I've become.
I’ll always remember that day you sent me that random nude on accident lmao changed my life
Randomize
