Totally forgot this... How weird was it when they were licking our faces
Mass texted booty calls to all the guys I've hooked up with this year to commemorate the end of the semester.
They kept trying to slap each other but they were poring beer onto their hands first referring to it as their baby powder
I'm a gymnast. they should know better than to let me get dunk near anything i can flip on
my math prof is telling us what to do in a gun fight. i dont want to live in oakland anymore.
How do I feel about a girl who has a g string tattooed on
I caught myself flirting with clients today. Someone needs to take me to pound town before I self destruct. This is a code red. I repeat code red.
What's the address and code again...does anyone need anything and why is my viking helmet on the bed?
Did you get any pics? And I can only imagine how inferior you must have felt knowing that somewhere in that room was a guy whose penis was the length of your forearm.
As he was cumming he yelled "Yahtzee" then said im free to go. Thats my one night stand
You licked my eyeball, you are officially cut off. If you just missed you can have a second chance on Friday.
Imma do four shots of whisky within two minutes and pass out. Otherwise this'll go badly.
I wore Yonce braids out last night and made out with a man and a woman #bowdown is right
He's a fucking ninja- think of the things he can probably do with his dick.
You look wasted in ALL of the pictures I just saw you in.
That can't be good for your liver!
Thanks for caring mom.
Randomize
