gavin joseph was born around 1 oclock 9lbs 12oz... over 21 inches long
Thats what she said
I woke up at 11 this morning in my car parked in front of the bar.
I know, I tried to wake you up, but I couldnt. So I walked home
I feel like I just won at life, no connection sex and free 12 pack of beer after. Does life give out trophies, if so I want a big one.
I glued a penny on the door Tricia believes its Patrick Swayze haunting our apartment. Fuckin potheads.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just experienced a full blown christian wedding. I am SO GLAD YOUR WEDDING WASNT THIS.
I just masturbated to the audio from my psych lecture . . . this screwing my prof fantasy is getting serious.
He wants to know how I lost my bra in his pants....id like to know too
There was a stripper pole on the party bus. Was being past tense because some fat chick somehow tore it from the ceiling while grinding
IT'S LINGERIE PURCHASED FROM A FLEA MARKET, THE ONLY THING IT'S GOING TO BE POSITIVE FOR IS A TEST FOR HIV
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
A cute girl just told me she forgot to take her birth control and winked... I've never been so conflicted about fleeing in terror
I'm going as your incestuous sister. If thats not the perfect winglady I don't know what is.
That was a very uncomfortable conversation to have without pants on. But his mom was pretty cool about it.
Leave it to me to sleep w a guy who gets poison ivy on his dick
In case you're wondering... Yes walmart will judge you for buying vodka and pickles at 645am.
She asked me to tell her the three words every girl wants to hear so I whispered "I play hockey" in her ear.
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