my door was closed and her door was closed but even over the r.kelly playing at full blast i was able to hear her say "THAT'S NOT THE RIGHT HOLE!". Def rethinking my roommate situation.
I wake up every morning and wish that I didn't have to wear a bra
Just watched my manager erase "we've been 2 days wo an accident" and change it to "0" these ppl are too high.
I'm telling people I'm celibate. It sounds cooler when it's by choice.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He likes Jesus. Game over.
Oooh wait, he just told me he was high.
You're making her cookies in enchange for knitting lessons. You will die a virgin.
We had on the same team jersey so at the time it made sense to hook up.
Duh.
Member that time when we got super drunk and had fun and fell in love
I remember it like it was tomorrow.
When he sent me a picture, I swear my vag frowned. That tiny.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My favorite bartender added me on Facebook. Now he can clearly see how under 21 I am
I took your mattress from your bed. Don't ask questions. Love you. See ya later.
LinkedIn just suggested I might know the guy I caught my wife fucking.
His last name was woodcox? That just screams I've got a great penis
It's hard not to feel like a terrible person with bruises on your tits.
My new plan is to whip out my titties when they arrive. Maybe they won’t notice that I broke the couch fucking my boss...
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