I just wanted to draw pictures of limp wieners on peoples doors and smash pictures of palm trees. That's it.
She was sucking his dick at Seacrets outside bar in front of all of us...her friends kept coming over crying and yelling "Tiffany stop it"
Apparently oprah and I were in competition to see who's ass could get bigger this summer
white shorts are a girls way of saying "im ready to fuck cuz its not my time of month"
By the end of the cruise, there was literally nothing in our room he hadn't peed on.
I'm up to 9 pic of different guys. I need 4 more boys and each one of the 13 to submit 3 additional pics. I wanna make a penis deck of cards.
All my credit cards need to be pressure washed
I had sex with a Dutch boy on a rock last night. Happy graduation! x x
it's just weird to think of you as a teacher since ive seen you throw up raspberry bacardi in my parents house
Same I threw up in 3 different cities already today
I cried while dry heaving in the back of the car to the New York song with jay z in it. I was singing it inbetween gags.
after what u told me last night I think we're past the wtf zone and at this point u should just join me in wondering if my barista lover is a gay porn star
I just remembered that before we left my house I vowed to stay fully clothed and I FAILED
I haven't even lived here for 24 hours yet, and I've already banged someone. My new hoe life is off to a great start.
He ate me out in the passenger seat of his Range Rover in a Tim Hortons parking lot. I could hear “oh canada” on the radio from a nearby school as I came. Most patriotic orgasm ever!
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