you puked in the cab and all over yourself and tried to convince the cabby it was there already when he got upset... then you puked again. not too convincing are you
I wish they had a smiley of two girls making out
I just found 22 drunken videos and 4 naked pictures on my phone. We'll start the bidding at $5
I need to stop hooking up with boys in my major. three boys in one class is just a litttle too awkward.
Found a bar with a washer and dryer and they serve food. I never have to leave
Bro, i just sang journey's "dont stop beleavin" at mcdonalds. and the guy was sooo impressed he gave us free food. God i love america
His penis is literally smaller than my cell phone. I can't go out like that.
The trees feel like magic. Come fly to taco bell with me.
It's been so long that I've occasionally forgotten I own a vagina
When I took off my jeans he became more excited about my Elmo underwear than sex but to be fair, who can blame him. They're awesome undies.
Seriously??? You send me boob shots with your husband and kids in them???
And I'm glad you're waiting to invite him over. he may have a weird penis thing and then dinner becomes awkward.
What's dad's email?
askmom@cause.idk
I just wanna get drunk and go sledding in my kayak
I’ve officially bought the ticket for my future dick appointment 😂
Randomize
