Im at strip club and am horny
Well, she's an atheist who is addicted to the Sims.
Who isn't?
Coffee is gods way of saying go ahead, get absolutly trashed on weeknights, I got your back
naighbors jacking off again. i swear its his friday night ritual, its like he knows the night wont be ending in his favor
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You were rubbing sand all over yourself and everyone else and claiming you were "EXFOLIATING."
As a fat white girl from Texas I can honestly say that she gave fat white girls from Texas a bad name.
Hell hath no fury like a woman whose gay sidekick you insult
At least I made out with him before he made out with that dog...
Just smoked a joint with the hottest patient. God I love night shifts.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm smoking pot with a man in a pink suit, size 15 wide shoes who bought his bowl from a place called Chinese Bling Bling while I'm dressed as a unicorn drinking pumpkin beer
If he's gonna send me dick pics; he should at least zoom in to make it look bigger.
I'm pretty sure I hallucinated the existence of an entire human being last night.
So I forgot to ask, how was that bartender you slept with two weeks ago?
Google chlamydia.
I honestly have no desire to wear clothes around you
I have that affect on people
I think it stinks she’s cheating on him. My vagina on the other hand is tingly thinking about a summer of sexual healing
Randomize