I love how girls just decide that guys who don't like them must be gay
I do the same thing. If a girl doesn't like me...I am like, "i must be gay"
if i hurry i can finally have sex while stoned off my ass
godspeed.
Just met someone from Jersey. No fist pumps or jagerbombs. Kind of disappointed...
oh my god i just remembered the cat blow jobs.
I got an MIP via FUCKING HELICOPTER. Tuscaloosa police either have nothing to do or too many resources.
I think I ruined Robin and Mikes anniversary. I walked in on them fucking, accidentally broke the necklace he gave her, and I stole the keg from their party. Not in that order
She said I had the biggest dick she'd ever seen. And when you consider how many she's come in contact with, it's kind of like winning the heisman.
If I EVER think it's a good idea to blow someone who just showed me their synchronized swimming performance on youtube again please correct me immediately.
How exactly do I approach the whole "Well that was fun. Am I purchasing the Plan B or you?" topic?
Ultimate Fighter Idea. You and I both have unprotected sex with the same girl in the spam of days. Whoever the child belongs to, wins and that child is the ultimate ultimate fighter.
How high are you?
I couldn't drown my sorrows in an ocean of jack daniels. They may have scuba gear.
Remember that time we turned a can of Axe body spray into a flame thrower?
They made up a new version of "Smash or Pass" called "I would(n't) let you sit on my face" to yell at the freshman
Then, he ate me out while I watched Bo Burnham. Best. Night. Ever.
I think even the taco bell employees judged me
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