you still trying to smash that chick?
it's a losing battle and she kinda sucks. been busy with school so not getting midweek drunk - she's nearly unbearable sober
Done. Eyebrows are waxed, entire body shaved
There needs to be a term for a female version of a rusty trombone
Im at a strip club, and the dancer just farted into my face. The bad part about that is I could taste the wings I bought her earlier
after taking her first shot and having her first random hook up she finally feels like she is ready for college
she has no idea
he described going down on me as being like 'entering a jungle of deliciousness and fur
He tried to slow-dance with me in bed. IN BED.
Also, I might need your help for a prank involving a hand puppet, a coke bottle, double-sided tape, and my dick...
Whenever I think to myself, "I don't work for a bunch of hours"... It's shot time?
On second thought, is it weird that I scheduled a surgery that determines my fertility around lingerie football night? I might have fucked up priorities.
Absolutely not. I would have done the exact same thing.
Your resume just got faxed, I also modified it a bit and sent it to strip clubs...expect weird phone calls...
Exactly best part of my night he took of his shirt and surprise traveler fanny pack
I was thrusting to the beat of Felix Navidad..
Sex and compliments. The way to my heart
And then you screamed, "I JUST WANNA POUR MAPLE SYRUP ALL OVER HIM AND RAVISH HIS BODY!!"
Randomize
