So I had sex in the woods... it was just as dirty as you'd expect it would be.. and not in a good way.
I have a feeling that after last night, i'm not just going to hell. i'm going to hell on a full scholarship. free admission bitches
home. puking in laundry basket.
Apparently throwing up on your own cape is still a party foul
Would we rather be in rehab with the drug addicts or the girls with low self esteem?
Just found a shot glass and plan b in my backpack...
Im guessing the shot glass is for plan c?
Ok now a guy in a winnie the pooh costume is grinding on some chick to the song shots
"Grocery shopping" is really just a euphemism for spending $20 on enough frozen food to last 2 weeks and spending the rest of your viable paycheck on alcohol.
My Instagram consists mostly of drag queens and people who dress up as power rangers... I'm pretty sure I'm an unclassified category of gay
QUIT RUINING DICK PICTURE DAY
I'm playing drinking games with a boy who looks like Liam Hemsworth. I think I'm fine.
My ex boyfriend just amazon primed me a vibrator...guess I seemed stressed?
He has me blocked on facebook.... so I stalked him using my cats fan page.
Just saw a girl I banged wearing a pro life shirt downtown. Not sure where to start with that.
When you realized the door was unlocked, you did the mission impossible yheme song and snuck into the bathroom. And continued it while you peed.
Randomize
