So I think I might still secretly love him despite the ass licking...
Hey ass licking is a very nice and intimate thing! Don't discredit your feelings
But what if he licks everyones ass?
I feel miserable, can't drink that much when I go out
We've been saying that since '98
i'm going through an 80s music phase. and by phase i mean i will only have sex to white snake
Yeah man i woke up and only had a Jimmy John's wrapper covering myself..
apparently my buddy was fucking on our couch downstairs so i decided it was necessary to walk downstairs naked in a hockey mask.
I am at a new level of appreciation for drunk-you, who threw up into her own sweatshirt pocket last night in the car. Brava.
I don't give a fuck that he's gay and keeps hitting on me. Free cocaine is free cocaine bro
Your the only person I know that needed stiches after a Monday morning conference call. How are you in your 20s? How
I felt like I was selling my soul to satan but then I realized I already pawned it for drug money
So, I actually said the words "but face tattoos are sexy"
First. I had the strength. Now. I am the death.
Ughh I think I'll just sit here in the dark and wallow in self-pity while drinking wine and knitting scarves for my future cats.
They think I fractured my spine while doing your cousin on concrete.
The police officer that arrested me Friday night just bought me a shot
send nudes
from the living room?
Randomize
