porn star on stage now. Get unkicked out.
I just bought the big bottle of Patron. It looks small. What have I done with my life?
Succeeded.
u know u need to get laid when watching mike wazowskis gf from monsters inc makes u horny
i either just walked in on pete wacking off to webmd or he was checking his dick for herpes
I coulnt tell if he was cumming or if I was throwing up
I maybe late, he's in a peeing contest with the neighbor's dog. Currently he's in the lead.
HE HAS A CHODE. LIFE IS NOT GOING TO BE EASY FOR HIM.
You may see me wearing your shirt to class. It's because I still have the spins and I'm anticipating throwing up on it. Asshole.
I have the perfect view of a sexy blonde in yoga pants stretching from the shoulder press machine. I'll be here all night. So glad I came high.
Ur here with me in spirit. Now run free. Run free
What's the right thing to say when he sends me a picture of his penis ?
I can't decide if I'm depressed or if this is just what life without a bidet feels like.
im too broke to be in a relationship this close to the holidays
You grabbed my shirt and said, "hope you're not attached" and ripped it off before I could answer you.
Woke up in the hospital naked with my id's taped to my chest. Also apparently puked on two guys, two girls and an escalade (at the same time). Good night.
you stood in front of the mirror for 20 minutes and finally said, "he can hear everything i'm saying inside my head. we need to leave." now try and tell me there is no such thing as too high.
Randomize
