i am watching brooke knows best right now and hulk is totally dating his daughter's look a like. it is gross and disturbing.
the most pressuring question is, why are you watching brooke knows best?.
dude can i febreze my hair or is that slutty?
if i get an abortion, then will you go out with me?
yeah, but i heard shes schizophrenic
i wouldn't even care dude, i'd fuck her and all 7 of her personalities.
Turned the water balloon filler into a jungle juice fire extinguisher. Please call me tomorrow afternoon and make sure that i'm still alive.
That penis you're staring at is the penis of heartbreak. Stay away. It will break your heart AND keep you away from other penises. BACK. OFF. THE PENIS.
i just remember pinky promising you guys to take care of him.
Siri just reminded me to pickup Plan B
If you wanna be a real wingman, create some insecurity and comment on that pic of all the hot girls with "Id do every girl in this pic.. except the fat one".
He held the beaver pelt from the fireplace over my crotch and asked his friend "she look familiar now?", he then remembered my name.
I feel like a bottle of fireball rented a bull dozer and ran me over until I was left without a shred of my dignity
Ya apperently its not "appropriate" to fuck in the school auditorium
For not being a nurse or a sex worker I have seen an alarming amount of penises.
This town is a penis wasteland. I haven't seen a suitable penis in months. This is becoming an emergency situation. I need penis in my life
He wanted to save my dignity, I just wanted beads and jäger
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