So, when he came he screamed MORTAL KOMBAT!!!! at the top of his lungs and all of his roomates yelled back FINISH HER!!!!.....yeah kinda akward
i woke up on my kitchen floor, halfway through a text, and my mascara running... this is why i stopped drinking tequila
I didn't take her seriously until she snorted that ramen noodle flavor packet...
Totally using formspring as an incognito way of making sure that girl from last night wasn't jailbait.
Hes flirting with her via the sauce packets at taco bell....... I have no words
I just want to curl up with him and brush his hair and sing love songs together, I think you should come over and end this
I consented to having my finger branded. How was your night?
I just found a video of you asking to be a whale with me.
My dad is so drunk he attempted to ride my two year old cousin's tricycle. For a solid five minutes.
My professor laid down on the floor and told us a story that involved being naked covered in Vaseline with a pumpkin on your head. No lie. This is going to be a great semester.
I told him to just roll me a blunt and put it in a heart shaped box.
I'm sure he'll make the rejection quick and completely justified.
It's snowing in May and there was a law school party at the strip club. The end is near.
The night went downhill when he took his pants off at our table and walked up to women saying "Special delivery"
My talents include parallel parking and over reacting about absolutely everything.. And drinking..
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