I have a feeling that after last night, i'm not just going to hell. i'm going to hell on a full scholarship. free admission bitches
Words of Wisdom: ordering a pitcher of whiskey cokes, putting a straw in it, and calling it your drink is not socially acceptable
Just boiled hotdogs in bongwater. NOT a good idea.
Drunk in some girls audi what the fuck is happenin i love sb
it's ELEVEN
thirty
I just overhead some girl saying that she's trying out for the real world so she has a backup if she doesn't get into teach for america...
you inspire me to be a worse person
Rule of thumb; if you ask me if my tits are fake you will not get to touch them.
We were high as shit. We argued for like ten minutes about going to Dunkin Donuts and then just ended up rolling down hills. Thanks for the weed.
I'm playing a lilo and stitch drinking game
Aloha alcoholism.
Something I never want to forget. I'm in a porta potty and she is outside knocking on the door going "You're a queen. You're a queen. Never think any different"
I just bought six bottles of the 2 dollar vodka. oh yes there will be blood
Have you heard yourself have sex?
I'm not THAT loud...
My neighbors filed a noise complaint.
You're the only person I know who's experienced a micropenis and a magnum XL penis
it was weird going down on him. His picture of Jesus was staring at me the entire time...
So she was amazing, that's what. Idk if it was the blow or the blowjob, but both my heads are still tingling.
Randomize
