Who has a tranny cab driver? I have a tranny cab driver.
She's like the female version of the Momento guy. She keeps forgetting that I'm an asshole after we have sex.
it was 5AM and you were field goal kicking solo cups into the sink
I only make drug deals in a British accent. It's my way of making sure it doesn't get too sketch.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Yo, if someone calls you asking for John Stamos, just go with it.
We don't have a ruler. Come downstairs and lay in the snow with a boner so we can see how much snow we've gotten. Put your 8 inches to a less shameful use.
mid blow job she looked up and said "we aren't even facebook friends!"
could you please not use my mortar and pestal for its intended purpose? i just snorted cracked black pepper.
Please. Last time I saw him I awkwardly pulled his rat tail until it got too weird
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Going to an AA meeting just so I can fuck him...That's dedication
Do the molecules within bourbon change when mixed with a cola to form a superior liquid treat?
I think there is a legit party going on the place we thought was AA
Is this a Beer, Vodka or Whiskey kind of problem solving night? It's imperative I stock accordingly.
Questions like that are why I love you.
my ex logged me out of his netflix so im gonna fuck his bestfriend as revenge
where are my eyebrows?
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