So I just went home and made my own spanx by cutting the legs off of a pair of nylons. I'm either a genius or missed my calling to live in a trailer park.
We even fucked WHILE he was making me breakfast in bed.
I hope I don't blackout because this is awesome!
Margaritas ran out of lime juice. Substituted Jaeger. Jaegerita not good.
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Maybe someone other than the mad hatter should have gone with him to the ER
i just added your friend Valery on the FB just to comment on your tits.... thought id give you a heads up
I had to close one eye to read the questions on my final this morning. That hungover.
It's was about average. But he had a tat on his thigh that said "pull-out n' rollout" so I won't have to worry about a round two request.
Who has the safety vest from this past weekend Additionally, who has the dancemaster glove?
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Our Tuesday night drunk Irish step dancing was on point tonight.
Not only did she fulfill a life long dream of mine of banging in a library, she bought me subway for lunch. I feel like I got the best gold star ever today.
its 3am and I'm taking a bubble bath, this is what taking a day off work at 30 looks like
i guess i fuck people who own bucket hats so i can't talk shit
you had me at "meet me in the bathroom"
Its safe now. But... Nobody should sleep on my bed tonight.
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