Far right against the wall..hiding come find me. dont tell oyhers hahaha
You can't keep basing your relationship off of the fact that you both love ramen noodles
5th glass of wine. There's pictures of Jesus everywhere. It's like you're constantly reminded of your sins here.
pretty sure if my vagina had a mouth, it would have been smiling afterwards.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i threw up in a box in my own lap driving today.
You left me on the phone while you grabbed a plastic bag and started puking. I recorded it. Its my new ringtone for you
she screamed "gravy"!!! in the guys face and then stole the very large mans food in line ahead of us... that was just the beginging of the police report.
rumor has it I kept asking you to go to the "tall grass" with me...sorry about that.
Drunk enough that you donated $50 to taco bell, because they serve a great purpose.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Can I just have sex with him and then never talk to him? I need him to be the Mr. Miyagi of my sex life.
He said that he doesn't like skittles. This relationship is over an it hasn't even started yet.
We were kinda loud so his roommate woke up and to make up for it he invited him to a threesome. I can't drink whiskey anymore.
it will be just like last year but no clogged toilets and more costumes.
I WOLD FCUK YUO INTOO THE MOON
THE MOOOOOOOON
I've needed to start drinking protein shakes to keep up with her. It's like my dick just started doing crossfit.
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