My first STD was from a foam party
Totally saw a hot amputee. I think this is called character growth.
I think my favourite thing about cubicles is the fact that I can pick my nose at work
I think he was having a seizure but nobody knew because 'what is love' was playing
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
mid puke you looked up at me and asked if it was your turn to sing
Yeah, she tried to drown her but then they hooked up.
I think I pulled my groin stumbling back from the bar. That or the hippo I woke up next to.
ME TOO. Am adrunk madr out qith. White guy. Guy de white. Blanco chico. Chico de blanco
I made out with my former step mother's best friend. Only knew the connection when they both showed up together at the bar.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It will be like a scavenger hunt.. only we're looking for places to have sex.
He's hot and has an accent therefore you don't ask questions when he tells you to take your pants off.
Just banged your ex. So it really is 'him, not you' in that he's gay. Rodeo champion gay.
Um went out in San Francisco last night and ignored someone hitting on me. So they bit my arm. Lmfao PLEASE TELL ME THIS ISNT THE SINGLE LIFE
This is me trying to take a picture to send to grandma. At 4. We were trying to look sober.
He ate me out while I finished season 1 of Stranger Things. If that's not a modern day relationship goal, then I don't know what is.
Randomize