I just peed in my kitchenbs sinlk. New low- maybe. am i embarrassed? Not in the least
I was on top riding him and his friend walks in and watched for a minute before he realized what was going on
Just found 2 diff. colored pubes in my underwear..new record.
I literally need to be slapped with another cock just to notice it.
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I can't wait till you move in so I can stop drinking alone.
it's a Wednesday?
:)
I feel like fucking him is something we all do but don't want to admit to. like masturbating or peeing in the shower
I've also decided that the true test of whether or not you should marry a girl is if she will willingly blow you while you eat Oreos.
Just drug him and when he wakes up be like "you just woke up from a coma, we've been married for the past five years." It'll be like the Vow but fucked up.
The hot tub didn't work. But it's okay because we discovered just how many people you can fit in a bathtub.
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On my way to get pizza I followed a dog into Salvation Army where I was just hired
I'm pretty sure I imagined the dog... They still hired me
Trying to figure out what I just puked. Demon weed is salad. No more drunk buffets.
unless you have a dick and you were thinking of chopping that off
I don't remember that much at all. But I guess I met this guy from New Zealand and his dog, and then I punched someone in the face.
A real best friend would support the hoe in me. Not remind me of what happened the last time I slept with a boss
Good Morning! You are sterile right?
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