hey remember that time we got really drunk, you tried to find narnia in my refrigerator and passed out in the freezer drawer??
no.
You were in the bathroom for two hours practicing "Revenge Faces".
we have to get out to the bar earlier. all of the guys are already committed to the girls they're going home with.
One last question would your parents let me sleep in your bathtub for the night?
So "Abstinence August" was a bust. Maybe I'll try for "Sex-free September" or "Only if we're facebook official October"
I AM THE KING OF THE FRESHMEN
how did i know this would happen?
There is a hatefuck that has the destruction level of an atom bomb raging through my viens just aching to vaporize her.
If he thinks that that is an acceptable way to ask me out he is out his goddamn ginger mindddddd.
Dude. I've never been with a guy who just wanted to go down on me all the time including while I'm shooting zombies on call of duty. My life is complete.
Nutrition teacher wants anything i eat or drink documented for the week including dancefestopia. Do you know the recommended daily ammount of psylicybin or MDMA?
Sometimes intelligent conversation doesn't mix well with a romantic interest. It's possible the two are best kept separate. Toys should just stay in the toy box.
On the bright side, only one more day until we aren't sober anymore.
Drunk text the hot guy two doors down confessing my love for him.... He gave me a thank you card today.
He just got home after serving 5 years in prison. And I think I may courtesy fuck him. Best Christmas present ever.
JUST BECAUSE I ANSWER THE DOOR NAKED CARRYING A BOTTLE OF RUM DOESN'T MEAN YOU CAN STARE NEIGHBORS.
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