During the middle of giving him head, he flashes his phone and says "I like to watch."
found a pic of my little bro & his girl naked. he got the brains and the huge junk gene. I hate him
just saw 2 fat kids fight for the last slice of pizza. Litteraly fight. God Bless America
I appreciate the offer. Swallowing pride is much like swallowing cum, difficult and unpleasant
You are the only one who would stop a bum, tell him to open up, then pour straight vodka in his mouth. You made his year.
She tried to sit inside the drawer to my dresser and when it broke, she burst into tears calling herself fat. Too high to deal with this
Maybe I'm a robot.
You can't be that drunk already
I vaguely remember making out with his tattoo (?) and giving him an awesome massage and then I passed out on his floor. Shrug
I actually bought food at McDonald's as an apology for what I was about to do to their bathroom.
So maybe I got drunk and hooked up with him in a hot tub? I mean that's nothing to be ashamed of, that kind of takes talent. I'd drown.
He gave me a beer, petted my head, and called me kiddo.
Whiskey and tits go great with anything. Especially fire.
Well, we all woke up in drag with no memory of why we were in drag. On the plus side, this shade of lipstick looks really good on me.
You gonna smoke this blunt? Or are you gonna keep doing Kung-fu in my kitchen?
couldn't remember his name. introduced him as 'mr multiple orgasms'
Randomize
