apparently farting at a cop is considered assault.
how is it that boston is so bitchin and the rest of massachusetts sucks so much?
how is it that you still think "bitchin" is an acceptable term anymore?
I just googled the nutrition facts for a mcgriddle and yet I still want to go to mcdonalds
You should see the damage i did to the apartment last night. So many broken things and butter sticks stuck to windows.No memorys
I don't know where Tiffany is but I just saw her shoes in the bar lost and found
I can't wait for paintbang. I'm going to throw a marker at a child. There will be bail money in my backpack in m trunk. Don't use it on beer.
He took getting"shit in your neighbors hot tub drunk" way to literally
It's 3:30pm, I've been out of bed for an hour and spent most of that barfing. We're switching to beer next debate.
If you ever insult pizza rolls again, I will dragon kick you in the throat
Haven't sucked a dick since mid December. In crisis mode.
Nothing better then waking up to multiple snap stories of people doing body shots of tequlia off of you
You're going to replace me with a robot made of heating blankets and a vibrator?
Here's a concept though: eating pasta while getting laid
What happened last night dude?
YOU SHIT ON MY FUCKING COFFE TABLE THATS WHAT FUCKING HAPPENED!!!
Remember how I made that resolution to remain celibate for 6 months? Well, I just broke that
You literally made that 4 hours ago...
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