I feel like tequila is Gods way of lighting my fuse to do something awesome
Just saw some guy walking down the street rapping about various types of pasta.
can a guy be partially circumsized? cause i dont exactly know what i was lookng at...
Ive been sitting around naked watching magic on youtube.
She just asked me if her C-section scar turned me on.
He considered it romantic when he told me mid-blow job that no matter what happens, he will "never forget how good of a dick I suck". Verbatim.
Don't remember shit. It was only until I saw the glaze on my forearm that I knew you drove to get donuts last night. I also spent 20$ there apparently
Can't a woman sleep on the floor in her own apartment in peace without being judged?
We were on the ground in Tampa for 55 hours and we drank for 30 of them.
We won Spring Training 2013.
Ate a live seahorse, then tried to order a nacho bell grande from an ATM.
How the fuck do you get to keep practicing as a Nurse.
Nope. Turns put my desperate group message for sex didn't work out.
Well you sent it to two guys who were roommates.
They could have rock paper scissored for it. My vagina = the prize.
I accidentally mass texted his dick pic. Not only to my friends, but to my dad as well...
He took some pill and now he's on all fours demanding we give him chips from the dog bowl. Come get him.
Just realized that I bailed on you guys yesterday just so I could get wendy's. it was worth it but still, sorry
I just remembered I casually gave you a tour of the house after we boned...lol
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