she's doing push ups on the keg. hows a girl supposed to compete with that?
Anything crazier than usual happen? I woke up in a stairway with my cock out.
and he thought i came like four times in 2 mins. my leg just kept cramping up
First time i ever had an awkward silence during sex.
Ok forget what i said about christmas break being awful. Chasing shots with fudge
i am already firmly committed to doing irish carbombs w/ 12 different people, and the st pattys day party doesnt start for another 24 hours. i may die
Day two of taking my adderall. I just organized the pantry and alphabetized my dvds. I've missed my mind on drugs
Bachelor party turned 19 hour search and rescue in the mountains. nbd
Btw, just wanna point out that you've hooked up with two guys whose birthdays are today. Congratulations, you have a type!
i cant wait to be back in my element of drunk, on a barstool, ive missed home
So I was bartending last night and this guy w/ his gf said that he recognized me, so I asked him, "do you watch a lot of gay porn?"
He drunkenly stumbled over to me and told me my "crotch looks spectacular tonight"..... i think this could work
Mid-fucking he screams "YOU CAN'T VOTE FOR TRUMP"
The night's not a success unless at least 60% of participants wake up with bite marks on their genitals the next morning.
I don't know what kind of parties you go to, but we should hang out more often.
I dont even know what happened i just remember waking up with beer cans outlining my body...
Randomize
