Whatever my ex gf's roomates talked shit about me so I jizzed in their shampoo bottle one night
Well now that I've given all the athletes mono there goes our chance of winning any conference championship
She broke up with him yesterday after she cheated on him. He's going a bachelor party next weekend. How has Homeland Security not raised the threat level?
It's like you are the superhero of getting jizzed on
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I feel like this is going to result in some sort of tearing in my vagina.
Thats a chance were just gonna have to take
Dreamed I made out with a stranger after falling out of a car, let's make this happen tonight.
Is it possibile to sprain your taint?
She was that bad?
Jesus christ it's been two texts and we are already talking about dildos
NO HOOKUPS IN THE CAR. I will try as i might to practice what i preach, but there are no guarantees.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
you know she was a bad idea when your mom offers to pay for an eHarmony account
Holy sore nipples Batman
Liquor has joined the party. Aly just fucking yelled "I LOVE COOKING" and poured margarita mixer, ice and tequila into the blender.
When God made him he put all his talent in his dick. What he lacks in brain, he makes up for in loin.
I smoked too much. I'm sitting on my balcony and I keep getting lost. Help me
I’m excited to finally meet my stalkee and his penis!
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