I'll let you put expensive food in me, but really, not much else.
His mom told be she once got turned down for playboy. 1 biggest mistake Hugh made. 2 is she hitting on me?
Woke up at 4:30am to my little brother shaking me. Apparently I fell asleep naked on my kitchen table waiting for the toaster to pop. 2 years of college completed and i still havent learned my drinking limit...
Yo. I have a shitload of cardboard. We have to build a smoke hut in the smoke room with a tunnel connected to a cat house. This way the kitty can join us whenever she pleases
IM PICKING UP BLOW FOR US STOP WHINING ABOUT SEX
I know it sucks but it's just something that needs to be done though. Like shaving ur pubes or going to the dentist.
How am I feeling this morning? Well, besides the fact that my vagina looks like a pair of giraffe's lips and I'm walking like an over-confident cowgirl, I'm fantastic. Thanks for your concern.
ALWAYS CAPS LOCK. IS THERE EVER A SITUATION THAT DOES NOT CALL FOR CAPS LOCK? NO.
Sexting? Sexting in caps lock seems rather unnerving.
I WANT YOUR BODY AND I WANT IT NOW.
I rest my case.
Yea we had fun. Lost my wallet some girl has it. Sarah fell asleep in a cab and ended up at some wawa. It was cray. She's home now
Probably TMI here but I just rubbed one out while listening to thunderstruck, almost ripped my dick off.
And also the fact that I woke up sandwiched between two gay men is probably fueling my day
Nothing like the judgmental looks you get in the bathroom when you still have last night's glowsticks on
Black labs can get you to do pretty much anything...even approach strange men in their bath robes
It was a "have 911 on speed dial" kinda night
I honestly think sometimes all you need is a $2 alcoholic punch poured from a jug into a big glass to feel better. I guess abblebees is my new problematic fav
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