nut hugger
his personality makes his face look like an asshole.
everything was going good until you started showing off the pictures of poop you took with your phone
Can you imagine it being physically possible any other way unless the cows are unnaturally flexible
You stayed up for three hours wasted, feeding my rabbit 2 1/2 boxes of girl scout cookies.
He freaked out when I started to orgasm. He said he never knew girls could orgasm too.
hey dude come in here and see how much of my beard i can put in my mouth!
Sweet and genuine is kinda lame. I'm more of a bust all over your face and hair kinda guy.
Uhm the hair is off limits bro, conditioner can only go so far.
Bro? You just made it a target.
I just let my hand run under cold water for five minutes. I couldn't stop staring at it and the only things I could think about were how amazing it felt, how cool water was, and what a wonderful world it is that we live in. Reasons why I don't smoke...
Did you see the video of me eating a marshmellow on fire?
Sext: Bring me pancakes from the midnight breakfast gathering please
What is more embarrassing, shitting yourself in Mexico or having sex in a forest preserve with a 19 yr old? This is crucial research.
I forgot to tell you that he serenaded me with "Fuck Her Gently" by Tenacious D. And I didn't hate it.
Don't tell me I can do whatever makes me happy while also saying I have to put on pants.
i just sexted for my mom while she was driving, i have hit an all time low.
Randomize