...is it true? will i see you next weekend
YES.
ah, i can't wait till there's negative 2 inches between us
Living right is spending a lot of time in someone's ass
Should I shave my pubes in the shape of a top hat so I can nickname my junk Abe Lincoln?
I learned his name tonight. This now makes him a real person. Obviously, I no longer want to sleep with him.
there really is only one way to give a PowerPoint presentation in your senior capstone class: still drunk.
Theres just something about looking at pictures of your dick in church that doesn't feel right
Moms kinda upset I threw up in grandmas bedroom. I think ill stay in tonight.
I don't remember. I think I elluded to the fact that I would buy him a dildo for his birthday.
I have a music final in an hour so I put all the classical songs we need to know in a shower power hour playlist, beer included.
It's been two days. My balls feel like watermelons.
I gave her at least chlamydia. Maybe worse. She is also into chicks and loves taking naked pics. It's like the less I believe in Jesus, the more he rewards me.
I'm sad we weren't friends when I went through my "I like drugging my friends" phase
They are the perfect team. One always has weed, the other always has cigarettes. They're like the Batman and Robin of drugs
I found her face down on the kitchen floor asking anybody who walked by for Kraft Dinner
Just slather his penis with BBQ sauce
Randomize
