my roommate just said, "don't look at it, just put it iin your mouth"
saw you walking with that piece of shit
and that piece of shit just read that
I'm thinking we should try to start remembering stuff we do. Althought I kinda like feeling like Nancy Drew the next morning.
More like the Hardy Boys cause its kinda like a team effort.
Yea went to the bars and he called me 2 hours later with random people saying he is at a place that i don't think exists
chugging beers on the train. people are staring. I would be offended if it wasn't 8:30
I made him a flow chart of what to do if I got arrested.
This hurricane better not stop me from sitting on the stoop thurs & enjoying all the slutty costume walkofshamers
What do you mean you don't want me to steal the manikin do you have any idea how expensive inflatable dolls are I can't get that for your birthday
we played animal sounds and i linked arms with her cuz we were both cats....fate and my community college drama teacher have chosen my one night stand
Just got to Evans to buy weed. His mom showed up unannounced. Now the three of us are chillen. Super.
i gotta stop hooking up with people just to get to their dogs
She got up, grabbed me a box of gushers told me to start eating, and immediately gave me the best head I've ever gotten.
just found a picture from last night.
the one of you riding a horse with nothing but a bulletproof vest on?
uhm.... no?...
I'm intrigued by how his mouth tasted the same as his dick.
I woke up to pee last night, got out of bed and proceeded to stand there because I had no idea where I was. Then, I heard my sexy as fuck personal trainers voice. Well-played blacked out me.
Randomize
