I wanna put my baby in that!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Ew you even made it your fb status
Ppl probably think ur having a kid
I hope
Love having children with random chicks
He muttered something about having just washed he sheets, then demanded I give him all my quarters.
If Bret Micheals dies..will VH1 have to go off the air?
Fell into a man hole last night. I've been bleeding since 11pm. Got kicked out of the bar for being bloody.
He has a really nice penis but its like a model that wasn't built to scale
She actually pushed her roomie out of the way and said 'You already fucked him it's my turn!'
Are there any plans to where i might need to be dressed semi-nicely or is it a "pants optional" weekend?
Is it weird that I want to have sex wearing my glasses and lab coat while having an actual scientific discussion?
She just texted me apologizing for taking selfies on my phone then asked me to send them to her
I woke up with my name tag for work still on my shirt. It was a rough night.
It was good. Ended up having a 3 hr make out session with her
What is this high school
There was a lot of catching up to do bro
Oh I see how it is...you can snap chat the world your balls but I wear dinosaur feetie pajamas and I'm the "weird one"
Anyway, all that to say that tiny penises are a hassle.
Does your Fitbit monitor your liver failure?
I cant wait to tell our kids we met because you subscribed to my onlyfans.
Randomize
