so evidently yelling "gay" everytime your bf tells you how he feels is cause for breakup. news to me
Dude, I woke up in the middle of the night and your room mate was just standing there at the foot of the bed, watching us sleep.. you don't remember me shaking the shit out of you to tell you this?!
This could explain the reason why I've been finding his clothing and keys scattered in random parts of my room..
AND THIS DOESN'T WORRY YOU?!
CAN CRIS ANGEL JUST LOOK NORMAL FOR ONCE?!
At what point did I eat out of your mouth?
I told him that he could only go home with me if he didn't talk or tell me his name
He shit in the bushes next to the pool at the Venetian, after throwing up in the hallway. You really can do anything in Vegas.
Accidentally spilled a drink on her roommates skirt, offered to clean it, and got a blowjob out of the deal. Something went horribly right.
I found out what happened to my eye. I punched myself in the face.
He knows my period schedule but not my work schedule.
Idk every story shes told me thats started with "back when i was a lesbian" has been my new favorite story
It's like a harem of immaturity and bad ideas...and that's coming from me
I have a theory that years from now they will be with women who despise me because of what I trained their husbands to like.
I was walking out the front door and heard his roomate say "It looks like you need a chiropractor." I think my work here is done.
Nothing says "Happy New Year" like having to shit into a plastic bag.
Imma go take shower so I can cleanly change into my drinking underwear.
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